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There’s A LOT of dating info out there telling you to play hard to get – telling you to play a game, manipulate, be inauthentic about your feelings, be elusive, and make the other person feel like they’re not good enough on some level – in order to get love from them…Pretty twisted.
Sure, it works – but only if you want a man who’s chasing you because he’s intrigued by a mysterious fantasy (that you won’t be able to hold up forever and will eventually shatter), or a man driven by an egoic need to prove he can have any woman he wants, or a man who lacks self-love and chooses unavailable women – none of which have anything to do with REALLY seeing you or seeing you as a potential life partner.
How could he even know anything that deep and meaningful for sure if you’re just putting up facades or playing hard to get?!
A relationship built on the above grounds will eventually break, no matter how great or passionate it started out in the first place…He was only into you because you were playing hard to get – a game that can’t be played forever.
So how do you allow him to pursue you in a way that doesn’t create self-sabotage?
By allowing him to pursue under the understanding and belief that there’s MUTUAL interest.
This is healthy: Dating a man who wants to stay around and explore possibilities because he believes you do TOO!
Showing mutual interest is an effective dating strategy for eliminating unavailable people, players, and people who’ll eventually turn out to be all wrong for you later.